As seen around Chicago

I was witness to a few things over the past few days that have stayed with me and make me ask the question, "What if?" more than a few times.

The first situation: I was driving down Webster on my way home from running a few errands. I spotted what I thought was a bald runner sitting on a front stoop, catching his breath from a tough run. His long lean legs were spread out and his elbows were on his knees and his head was down. As I approached a stop sign and was slowing down, this 30-something guy raised his head and I instantly noticed that he had no eyebrows. I looked down and between his legs was a big puddle of what can only be described as "his lunch". I couldn't take my eyes off this guy. He tried to stand, with the help of the brick wall behind him, and then he leaned over to pick up 3 grocery bags, swaying the entire time as he was completely off-kilter. It took him a few seconds to gain his balance and find the strength to pick up these plastic bags from the ground. I wanted to stop, pull over and offer to carry his bags and lend a hand to help him get to his destination. Just as I was playing my moves in my head as to not offend him in my offer, he slowly walked around the corner and into a building. I guess he was home.

Obviously this young man was going through some kind of treatment to treat some kind of illness. Here I was....just mindlessly running my errands, probably irritated at the traffic and wondering what I'm going to have for dinner....all while this young guy is literally fighting for his life. For a few days after that and even now, I wished I had stopped to help him.

The second situation: I was sitting on a curb waiting for Brian to pick me up from the Metra train that I take to and from work about 3-4x a week. Our meeting spot is a 7-11 convenience store parking lot that is smack dab in the middle of an industrial area of Lincoln Park. As I was listening to an audio book on my iPod and appreciating the fact that the sun was warming my back, a man in his late 30's who was accompanied by a young girl who couldn't be more than 9 or 10, walked in front of me. I noticed that he was opening a box of Banquet fried chicken that he apparently bought in the 7-11. They started eating the frozen chicken right out of the box as they crossed the street. I noticed that they were both pretty dirty and their clothes were stained and worn. The man was eating ferociously. From the time he walked past me to cross the street was no more than 5-10 seconds and by the time he crossed the street, he was already throwing a bare chicken bone into the street while he reached in for another.

If I was a betting woman, I'd bet that this was a homeless father/daughter duo walking back to the spot they called their "home"; probably in an empty warehouse or factory.

Talk about seeing things that tug at your heart strings! Let us all be grateful for our health, the roof over our head and our livelihood.

And if I see someone else in distress, next time I'm going to try to help.

The Wedding Reception is on YouTube

Yes, I'm serious.

I don't mess around. What better way to share our special moments with those who couldn't join us than to post them on YouTube?

www.youtube.com/djstoer

5 Year Itch

I don't know if it's just that it's still 39 degrees in Chicago on April 28th and less than 2 weeks ago I was enjoying the hot weather in Mexico, but I definitely have the itch again to move.

I want to be in the warmth.
I want to be in the sunshine.
I want to jump up out of bed and go for a run or a swim or a bike ride and not put on a coat first.
I'm sick, sick, sick of the cold!!!!!!!!!

Let's take a look at where I've lived and when:

(I left for the Marine Corps when I was 17. )

1993 - 1998 Yuma, Arizona

1998 - 2003 Cleveland, Ohio

2003 - 2008 Chicago, Illinois

Do you see the trend here? Why is it that once that 5 year mark rolls around, I want to get the F out?

Please give me some sunshine and warm weather, God, please!

The Wedding

I know this is long overdue, but since we've been back from Mexico, it's been REALLY, REALLY nice to just come home from work, go the gym if I want to or stay home if I want to and just walk the dog.

Not having anything to do.....heaven!

But I thought it was only fair to at least post a little somethin' about the day I've been blogging about for a year.

The whole week in Mexico was filled with the hot sun, smiling faces, flowing drinks, never-ending buffets, tequila shots, volleyball games in the pool, beer drinking contests and best of all, happiness.

Cue the "awwwwwwww".

The main reason I wanted a destination wedding is this: every wedding I've been to as a guest, I've barely spoken to the bride and groom. You could see the whirlwind they were surrounded in and you just knew they'd barely remember it all. I wanted time with my guests. I wanted to savor the experience. I wanted something that they remembered. And all I can say is....SUCCESS!

B and I got to Mexico on Tuesday. This was great for all but one reason: I had to eat buffets 3x a day and watch everyone sip daiquiri's, margaritas and cerveza's for FIVE LONG days before my big day. When we arrived, I was down to about 17% body fat and 125 lbs. Every morning, I got up at 8am and threw on my running shoes and was out the door with my iPod. After a 30 minute jog, I was in the jump for another 30 minutes of calisthenics. I'm very happy to report that I was STILL 125 lbs on my wedding day...thanks to the fact that I barely touched alcohol the previous 5 days.

Okay, so, yes. I have some body-image issues. But they are mine and I'm okay with that.

Every day B and I would meet and greet our arriving guests. Almost everyone got there by Thursday, we had 3 couples arrive on Friday. I think we were able to sit down and chat with almost every single guest, one on one. That was the great part of Mexico.

On Thursday, a few of us were heading inside to the lunch buffet and in the lobby I was greeted by one of my bridesmaids, Loretta. We hugged and kissed and she told me she had a surprise for me. Low and behold, there was my girlfriend, Carmen, who was supposed to stand up in the wedding but found out she was expecting. The baby was due 2 weeks before the wedding but he came 5 weeks early. So she got a plane and left her 8 week old baby with his Dad and she surprised me in Mexico! Oh my God did this moment rock. I cried and cried. It was one of my favorite moments of the week. How blessed am I to have people like this in my life?

Thursday we had a Meet and Greet Happy Hour in one of the bars so that our guests could all meet one another. It was awesome to see everyone bond instantly. There is just something about vacation that allows you to check your stereotypes at the door and allows you to be happy and carefree.

We lugged 50 lbs of gifts to Mexico. That was no fun. We gave everyone a yellow beach bag with a yellow and white cabana towel in it. We filled them with disposable cameras, candy, candles, sunblock, chap stick and the like. The bag proved to be very useful as EVERYONE used theirs when they were there, so it allowed people to spot those in our group very easily. If Uncle Bob didn't know my friend, Loretta, they spotted each others bags and struck up a conversation. Nice.

Friday was so fun. We got out early and reserved a spot by the Activities Pool (aka the crazy pool with the loud music and beer drinking contests). Most of our friends had arrived by then and we all gathered at this pool and hung out, drank and played a nice game of volleyball in the pool.

Afterwards, everyone cleaned up and we met at the Rehearsal Dinner. I shared a wonderful moment with my Mother-in-Law. She pulled me aside and looked like she was going to burst into tears. She told me how happy she was, how beautiful I looked and how excited she was to have me in the family. It was a tear-jerker.

Game day:

I thought I'd be nervous as hell on Saturday but I wasn't. I waited for it to come, but it didn't. It was right. All was right in my world.

I had sent my dress to be steamed and it still hadn't been delivered to my Mom's by Saturday morning. My MOH took charge of the situation and she called my wedding planner and found the dress.

I met my bridal party for a nice breakfast and then hit the salon for a mani/pedi. We went back to the room to start getting ready. I was so lucky to have my girlfriend, Holly, there who does hair and makeup for weddings. She brought her airbrush and all of her makeup down and did everyone's makeup. I got a little teary eyed while we were getting ready; every time I'd make eye contact with my MIL or my Mom.

When it came time to head out to the beach, my heart fluttered but I still felt really good. I was just happy, I can't really explain it. I wasn't nervous at all. A golf cart took us to the beach. My Mom walked me down the aisle where I met a weeping Brian. I was shocked that he was so emotional but it was so touching. I thought I'd be a mess, but when I saw him crying, I think it gave me strength. I wanted to comfort him.

The officiant was great. Everyone told us what a great job he did and how touching his words were. The ceremony only last 20 minutes and we all enjoyed champagne on the beach before we took pictures.

After pictures, we headed into the Theater bar, a bar open to the ocean, and enjoyed cocktails for an hour. The reception was poolside and started an hour later. It was great...everything was beautiful, the weather was phenomenal and the food was the best we had while we were there. So far I was a happy bride!

The only real glitch that day was finding out our DJ didn't speak a word of English. So we had to pull a guest to MC for us. He introduced us for the first dance and he MC'd the garter and bouquet throws. The first dance was great....Brian and I took lessons for the Foxtrot and we weren't nervous or anxious...that part was great.

My FIL, Best Man and MOH all gave toasts/speeches. They were all fantastic but I'm happy we got them on video because I, too, gave a speech and I was rehearsing in my head while they were talking (rude, but necessary). Now let's get one thing straight: I had public speaking. I always get real nervous and sweaty and I can usually hear my heartbeat in my ears. When it came time for me to speak, I stood up and told Brian I'd be back (he had no clue I was giving a speech) and I took the mic. I had a full 8.5 by 11 piece of paper filled with one paragraph after the next, but I read it so many times that I didn't need to use my notes (even I was surprised by this) and I was able to look at each person I was speaking to. My strategy was to say it so many times over and over that it would just be one word after the next and I could get through it without crying. Easier said than done. I was able to get through it with minimal tears but I was still shocked at how easy speaking in front of my loved ones was, but what I wasn't expecting was everyone to be crying with me. I thanked our guests and said a few words to my friend Carmen, my bridesmaids, my MOH, my new in-laws, my parents and then, Brian. That moment was awesome. Brian looked like a deer in the headlights. He didn't know how to react to my speech. I loved it.

We all danced the night away and after the reception we went to the Hacienda, which is a disco at the resort that opens and 11pm. Most of us were exhausted so it was still an early night. I think everyone was back in their rooms by 1pm.

Sunday Brian and I went with my MOH and her boyfriend on a zip line tour. We mountain-biked to each of the three zip lines and then swam in three cenotes (pure Mayan water-filled caves with century old hanging stalactites). It was gorgeous there. It was also nice to spend some one on one time with Laurel, too.

Sunday night the hotel delivered a chocolate cake and champagne to our room. It was a pretty decent sized cake and you know what? I ate it all. haha....I did! We were watching our wedding videos and I was eating one bite at a time...I looked down and it was gone. But damn did I deserve that cake!!

Monday we hung at the pool and just relaxed. I ate and drank whatever I wanted. And then I ate some more.

We got back to Chicago on Tuesday and headed back to the grind by Thursday. Now we get to enjoy life as newlyweds ;)

More wedding pictures!

We were very lucky to have a semi-pro photographer as one of our guests. Click here to see his awesome photos of our wedding extravaganza!

I'm back!

Well I'm trying my darndest to get back into the swing of the things at work, but so far, I'm unsuccessful in my efforts.

So I thought I'd post a few pictures from our week in Mexico. I don't have many of the actual wedding day since we just handed our camera to people and asked them to snap away.

This is my favorite picture with my girls!

We had 53 people total who made it to Mexico. Unbelievable!

Almost there....

My clothes are laid out.

The limo is arranged.

Our dog/house sitter has her directions.

My wedding dress gets picked up tomorrow.

By this time next week, I will be Mrs. Deanna O'Connell and I'll be sipping the fattest margarita known to man with my new husband!!

Sleep tight, internets. Sleep tight.

Scorpion Dreams

So the crazy dreams continue.

This time it wasn't about my wedding dress being stolen by my photographer. This time it was more personal.

In my dream, I was at my Mother in Law's house sleeping on her couch. The scene was actually the living room in the house I grew up in. My Aunt Marcia (well, technically, Brian's Aunt Marcia) was sleeping on the couch across from me.

From the other couch she whispers my name in a frantic voice trying to wake me up. "Deanna! Deanna!!!!" I open my eyes from a deep slumber and look over to her and she continues her loud nervous whispers. "Look at the floor! LOOK AT THE FLOOR!"

I look down to find scorpions, yes Scorpions, all over the place. And these weren't your average 2 inch scorpions that I used to see in Arizona. These suckers were like 8 inches long! So in my dream, I turn on the light that is next to the couch and all of the scorpions scattered all over the place...under the couch, into the walls, out of the room.

What in the WORLD could that dream mean??

I looked up "Dreams about Scorpions" and this is what I found:

To see a scorpion in your dream, represents a situation in your waking life which may have been painful or hurtful. It is also indicative of destructive feelings, "stinging" remarks, bitter words and/or negative thoughts being expressed by or aimed against you. Your dream forewarns of a self-destructive and self-defeating path. The scorpion is also a symbol of death and rebirth. You need to get rid of the old and make room for something new. Alternatively, the scorpion may also represent a person who is born under the astrological sign for Scorpio.

I guess if I really wanted to do a deep dive into my inner-psyche, then it would point to the fact that I am walking down the aisle in 9 days and there are probably all kinds of feelings emerging from my subconscious. When a bride walks down the aisle, she is usually accompanied by her father. But not this bride. This bride will be accompanied by her Mother because her father hasn't been in her life for many years due to all of the pain he has caused (and when I started talking in 3rd person, I don't know).

And guess what? My good ole Dad? He's a Scorpio.

I think the fact that I was in my MIL's house and was warned by Aunt Marcia was symbolic of feeling protected by my new family from the scorpions. So while the dream might have been crazy, I think it shows me I am ready for the death of the relationship with my Dad and the rebirth of my new extended family.

Does anyone agree? Or am I just losing my mind the week before my wedding?