It's never that bad.

I’ve been thinking about my friend, Skip, a lot since I read a blog about his Mentor, Paul Tilley, yesterday. Paul was the top Creative Officer at DDB, the ad agency where Skip used to work. Paul decided that he couldn't take it anymore and he jumped from the Fairmont Hotel in Chicago on Friday evening, which is right next to the offices of DDB. He was 40 years old and had a wife and 2 little girls.

I’ve been googling it to find out more. I'm a little obsessed with it to be completely honest. I want to find out that he had a mob hit out on him or was being blackmailed and his family's safety was being threatened. I want to read that he was just informed that he had Stage 4 Pancreatic cancer and didn't want to have to suffer or let his kids see him deteriorate. I have been unsuccessful in finding out any details as to WHY a successful ad exec with two small kids and a wife decides to take his life....and to jump from a building no less. The only thing I read was that his wife said, "Life is complicated. Paul was a complicated man". That seems like the understatement of the year.

I can’t help but look up at the buildings as I walk to and from my office every day. I feel so sorry for the CTA bus driver who witnessed the event. I just can’t wrap my arms around something like that and I didn’t even know the guy. I can only imagine what my buddy, Skip, is feeling right now.

I just don’t get it. It’s NEVER THAT bad. It’s NEVER something that you can’t come back from. If it was his job, then quit. If it was his wife, then figure it out or move on. If it’s criminal or drug related, deal with the consequences and learn from it and move passed it. If it's health-related then fight it.

It’s messing with my head in a very gruesomely curious way.

For now, all I can do is to pray for his wife and his family. I'm also praying for Skip.